|
|
 ♥ Mailing Address ♥
|
|
Send all your loves and hates to
Chew_Jing_Jie@hotmail.com
(Also Friendser & Facebook E-mail) |
|
♥ Good Reads ♥ *Please comment to be added/removed from this list
|
♥ It's time to grow up ♥
5.13.2008
hellos to all little kids, are you hitting teenage year yet? If so, here's a list of things you should finally find out now, and grow out of the "wish upon a shooting star" life. Because the world you are stepping into is not going to "hush hush baby baby" you.
1) You number 1 goal in life is no longer just to get A for all your papers. Because everyone else around you can get an A too.
2) Unlike what your mommy/teacher told you, sex is not a bad thing to avoid. In fact, you won't be here without sex in the first place.
3) There is no pot of gold at the end of an rainbow, the rainbow is actually a huge spectrum circle in the sky.
4) You are going to die soon cos of global warming, it's a REAL thing. Now that you've learnt something in your textbook. And the fact that you are reading this entry obviously didn't help much with energy consumption reduction.
5) Smoking and drinking are not as bad as it seems, considering inhaling 2nd hand smoke, eating msg, sleeping in aircon are equally as harmful.
6) There is no boogie man under your bed, in fact, that will be the least of your worries when you grow up.
7) Not all blonde asians are ah beng/ah lian, we just happen to be different.
8) Bear is actually a fearsome creature which will not hesitate to eat humans for lunch, so tone down on your love for teddy bears.
9) Your childcare/school teacher are getting paid to teach and nurture you, so don't take them as volunteers to clean your diapers.
10) Having sex is not equal to getting AIDS.
11) Pink is for girls and blue is for boys already don't exist, colors are for everyone.
12) If you are ugly, you are doomed.
13) Your childhood dream of getting to a university stops now, you have to think of life beyond university.
14) With the $1.50 pocket money you got from primary school, you can possibly get a one way trip to Orchard road and do nothing else there.
15) Breasts do not contain milk all the time. They are actually fats.
16) Skinny is not a nice contour, fat is grotesque. Take your pick.
17) You cannot have only 3 set of clothings in your wardrobe, you will die.
18) Your mommy and daddy will die someday and leave you to fend for yourself. Whether you like it or not.
19) You will definitely develop the hair you see on human figures in your science textbooks, so there's really no point in wishing for a naked mole's body. Of course we have several razors and waxing services in the market.
20) When people tell you looks don't matter, the are lying.
21) The world is full of liars, you will become one of them.
22) If you are not in the Phelps family, you will go to hell.
23) Gays and Lesbians are not another species, they are human like you.
24) Gambling is not a crime, it boosts economy.
25) Most people cannot accept you for who you are, deal with it.
26) Let's not crush your dreams, toothfairy takes your tooth, but what does she do with them? Santa Claus comes out every year, but you didn't receive a present from him. Don't worry, it's not cos you're naughty for having sex.
27) If you are different from the common people, they WILL treat you as aliens. If you are the same as them, you will start treating people who are different from you as aliens.
28) Hello kitty has no mouth. So she can't speak or do oral sex.
29) You will grow out of your cuteness as a child.
30) Welcome to the real world.
 Penned at 5:19 PM
|
